Some of me poems

Not poems that I've written but ones that happen to be in my head right now.

Twas brillig
And the slithy toves
Did gire and gimble
In the mire

I think Edward Lear wrote that one. Or was it John Winston, sorry, Ono, Lennon, he who created the Rinkle Dinklebone character. And then there's this one:

Hitler has only got one ball
The other is in the Free Trade Hall
His mother sat on the other
And now he hasn't got any at all

This one came into my head while I was waiting for the traffic lights to change and I noticed that the car in front of me was a Mercedes, the make that Adolf Hitler used to get driven around in. I wonder if people who own Mercedes' cars know this or even care. Same goes for fashion person Hugo Boss. I heard on TV recently that he designed the uniforms for the soldiers of the Third Reich and even for Adolf and his entourage.

Moving along, this is the filthiest limerick I know:

There was a young man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it
He said with a grin
As he chewed his foreskin
If my arse was a cunt I could fuck it

This is a mathematical one:

There was a young man from Bengal
Who had an octagonal ball
The square of the weight
Of his penis plus eight
Was four fifths of nine tenths of fuck all

And this is my favourite, very politically correct:

There was a young lady from Bude
Who went for a swim in a lake
A man in a punt
Stuck a pole in her ear
And said, "Hey, you can't swim here, it's private"

Boom boom.

The only real poem I can quote is The Rainbow by William Wordsworth:

My heart leaps up
When I behold
A rainbow in the sky
So was it when my life began
So is it now I am a man
So be it when I shall grow old
Or let me die
And I would hope my thoughts to be
Bound each to each by natural piety

Or something like that. Check it on Wikipedia and tell me I'm wrong.

We had to learn that peom at school for English Literature. We also had to learn Samson Agonistes but I can't remember a word of that.

One of my favourite poems is Annabel Lee by Edgar Allen Poe. I particulary like this part:

And neither the angels in heaven above,
Nor the demons down under the sea,
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee
It's a weird poem. Check it out. And check out The Bells, another of my favourites, not just because it is heavily onomatopoeic but because it includes the word, "tintinnabulation".